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World of Vince.com

Gorilla suit antics, music ratings and some spoof letters to organisations across the UK

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Vince Kong, London Tourist

2007-12-15 07:44:30

I've lived in London for over ten years now and have seen most of the tourist attractions it has to offer, so as if introducing them to an old friend, I took Vince Kong along to meet the Queen. She wasn't in sadly....

Vince Kong group on Facebook

2007-09-11 07:40:10

Have you ever noticed how many groups on Facebook are dedicated to the most inane topics? Well, I thought I'd climb aboard that particular bandwagon and setup The Adventures of Vince Kong group!...

Vince Kong runs the British 10km

2007-07-03 05:13:09

I've always been a fan of people who run the marathon in fancy dress and hoped that one day it would be me, so when we decided to enter the British 10km run, I thought of nothing else but realising my dream and running as Vince Kong. It wasn't easy I can tell you. In the weeks prior to the race, Ben, Dan and Rob pounded the streets of their home towns, comparing times and projecting how long they'd take to finish the race. I opted instead to devise a tough training regime that would surely see me complete the race in a world record time for a gorilla. Sadly, a few too many nights out left my schedule in tatters and I ended up just doing a bit of cycling. Rather too quickly though, the race was upon us and the four of us made our way to Piccadilly Circus at a very unreasonable hour on Sunday morning. I needed to "become" Vince Kong and due to the lack of changing facilities in the centre of London, soon found myself standing in my boxers as perplexed tourist's wandered by. I'm...

Vince Kong runs the British 10km

2007-07-02 22:13:09

Elvis Kong on a pub crawl

2007-04-26 00:39:10

For a long time now, I've been planning on becoming Elvis Kong and visiting the great Lou Jordan, Elvis-impersonator to the stars!! Sadly, I turned up but Elvis hadn't just left the building, the sod hadn't even turned up!. I was a little nervous, I'd built this up in my head and had it down that this was going to be my best Vince Kong outing ever, so to try and settle my nerves, I grabbed a Carlsberg and turned on the Spurs v Sevilla game. About twenty minutes and three lagers later, I started to worry that drinking is only going to make me want to go to the toilet, and going to the toilet in a gorilla suit and an Elvis costume, in a busy pub, is going to be quite a challenge. I mulled this over with the fourth beer and decided that this one would be my last, thankfully it really was my last, I'd only bought four. The pub where Elvis was playing was probably about a kilometre away and I'd decided to walk the whole way. Leaving the flat was brilliant and seconds later I was...

Elvis Kong on a pub crawl

2007-04-25 17:39:10

Vince Kong at the football

2007-04-14 20:14:52

It's been a fair while since Nottingham Forest were the toast of Europe, nowadays we're desperately trying to get out of the third tier of English football. So I thought I'd introduce Vince Kong to the beautiful game, sadly beautiful it was not! Millwall are a South East London side better know for their fighting skills off the pitch rather than the football on it, so I did feel a little nervous turning up in my gorilla suit, and I could sense Lucy wasn't too happy about it either. I left with the words "don't get beaten up" ringing in my ears and caught a train to Waterloo. The journey was quite fun, a bunch of ten year olds on the train were amused by my costume so I asked them to take my picture, they seemed to go into a huddle and I heard "he wants us to take his photo!" from within, then one of them was thrust forward and took my photo (thank you!). It got a bit boring after that, so I decided to walk through the train, that was also a bit dull, so I went a sat in firs...

Vince Kong at the football

2007-04-14 13:14:52

Vince Kong commutes to work

2006-09-13 22:34:04

I have a relatively easy journey to work each day, so why the hell would I get up an hour earlier in order to embark on a journey that's twice as long? Any excuse to become Vince Kong once again! When I first thought of commuting into work dressed as Vince Kong I thought it was a good idea, but it'd never happen. That all changed when Will agreed to be my co-commuter and cameraman, I am eternally grateful. Thanks very much Will! The journey to work At some point in the morning, I managed to get myself showered and cycle across to Will's place, I don't know how, it just happened really. When I got there, I slipped into the Vince Kong outfit and off we set! I had to get a travel card first, so we made a quick stop in the newsagent before heading across to the bus stop. It was quite a low-key start, the people at the bus stop didn't seem to be that bothered that there was a rather short gorilla standing right behind them. Except one chap who seemed to have a permanent grin th...

Vince Kong commutes to work

2006-09-13 15:34:04

I have a relatively easy journey to work each day, so why the hell would I get up an hour earlier in order to embark on a journey that's twice as long? Any excuse to become Vince Kong once again!...

Vince Kong gets married

2006-08-08 21:21:44

I know what you're thinking, surely a guy that very much enjoys dressing up as a gorilla (and a falcon), just needs to get out there and get a girlfriend. Well, I just married her! Yes, former Vince Kong photographer and full time "love of my life" has traded it all in to become Lucy Kong. As you can see from the photo's, Lucy has no problem been seen out and about with a chap in a gorilla suit. Ok, that might not be entirely true, when we were planning the big day I did mention the possibility of using the gorilla suit but that was met with a stony stare and a disbelieving "you are joking aren't you?". I changed tack a little and tried to get her to agree for a little honeymoon Vince Kong action, still she did not budge. After some persistence though, I managed to get my new bride to don her bridal gown for a Vince Kong re-enactment of our wedding day, it was the happiest day of my life! The real wedding wasn't too bad either! Many thanks A big thanks to all of the follow...

Vince Kong gets married

2006-08-08 14:21:44

I know what you're thinking, surely a guy that very much enjoys dressing up as a gorilla (and a falcon), just needs to get out there and get a girlfriend. Well, I just married her!...

Flash the Falcon - Mascot Sevens

2006-06-17 12:52:37

With the dance off and my "meet and greet" now complete, I had about twenty minutes to watch the game itself before heading back to the changing room for the main event, as far as I was concerned, the mascot rugby 7's! When I reached the dressing room, the atmosphere was much more lively than before. There seemed to be a genuine anticipation around the place this time. I started to climb into the falcon suit and after a few minutes, I noticed that we had an extra mascot, although it wasn't until we were ready to go out that he put all his costume on and I could see what he as. I kid you not, he must have been at least fifteen foot tall! And a wooden spoon! Trying to get him out of the changing room was excellent, I can only liken it to three chaps trying to get a small wardrobe up three flights of stairs, lot's of "To me", "To you" and "You swing your end round and I'll walk forward" kind of talk. A short while later, fourteen mascots, a fifteen foot wooden spoon and a genuin...

Flash the Falcon - Mascot Sevens

2006-06-17 05:52:37

Strictly need to know

2006-06-15 13:09:38

I'm out of the office but I don't think you need to know where I really am do you?! Hello there!! How are you today? Are you well? I heard about your little escapade on the tube last week and I have to say that I was very impressed! I never knew you could even get that many penguins in London, let alone do what you did with them! Great work! So, I’m not here, can you guess? I’d tell you where I am but it’s on a strictly need to know basis, and you don’t need to know I’m afraid. Between the two of us though, let’s just pretend I’m somewhere very snowy, fighting polar bears, and beering it up with the ice maidens! I’ll bring you back iceberg if you want - and I’m not talking about a blumming lettuce! Hope all is great! Laters, Vince....

Strictly need to know

2006-06-15 06:09:38

I'm out of the office but I don't think you need to know where I really am do you?!...

Flash the Falcon - The Dance Off

2006-06-05 21:43:49

After a week of high anticipation, the big day arrived! Today was the day I would become Flash the Falcon, mascot to the Newcastle Falcons! I arranged to meet Jon at Twickenham train station to pick up the various passes and instructions for the day, given the occasion I felt there was no better way to do this than to be dressed as a gorilla. It's only a short walk but in that time I managed to get harassed by a mobile phone salesman, waved at by a bunch of old ladies on a bus (when you're hot, you're hot!!) and scare the crap out of some poor kid who just didn't see me coming. Fantastic! Passes in hand (and now out of the gorilla suit), Lucy and I made our way down to the ground so I could have a quick pint of Guinness before heading to the changing room to transform into a Falcon. At this point, the only photo I'd seen of Flash was on the Newcastle Falcon's website, and my excitement was beginning to be tinged with a degree of nervousness. The day was split into two parts...

Flash the Falcon - The Dance Off

2006-06-05 14:43:49

After a week of high anticipation, the big day arrived! Today was the day I would become Flash the Falcon, mascot to the Newcastle Falcons!...

Flash the Falcon - 2 days to go

2006-05-26 13:52:22

Day 3 was a good day, but sadly not a good day for my training programme. It started off well enough, healthy breakfast, bit of a walk, healthy lunch, and I still haven't had a cup of tea, water all the way! Then came the beer, I could probably be forgiven the six pints of Carling if I didn't follow it up with a kebab on the way home. On the plus side, I got my very tasty kebab from the Golden Grill and would you believe it but there's a photo of me on the wall, dressed as a gorilla with the kebab chaps. I didn't reveal my secret identity, I shall keep that under wraps for the time being!...

Flash the Falcon - 2 days to go

2006-05-26 06:52:22

Day 3 was a good day, but sadly not a good day for my training programme....

Flash the Falcon - 3 days to go

2006-05-24 23:19:26

It's day 2 of my training programme, only 3 days until I become Flash the Falcon! I had intentions of stepping up my efforts today, it didn't quite work out that way. Exercise I started this morning by getting up at 6am for an early morning run, when my alarm went off, I quickly changed this to a mammoth session of lying down...in my bed...asleep. I managed to keep this up for an impressive 75 minutes! When I got home from work, I thought another bike ride would be in order, or at least a short run, I don't know what actually happened but somehow I managed to bypass all this, head to Marks and Spencers and spend the next half hour eating chicken and playing Xbox. I did manage a few weights though, does that count? Diet Today I gave up drinking tea. Normally, our tea round at work gets through about eight cups of tea each from nine to five, I had none today and drank lots of water instead. I feel knackered!, but Lucy has told me this is normal as the caffeine leaves my syst...

Flash the Falcon - 3 days to go

2006-05-24 16:19:26

It's day 2 of my training programme, only 3 days until I become Flash the Falcon! I had intentions of stepping up my efforts today, it didn't quite work out that way....

Flash the Falcon - 4 days to go

2006-05-23 20:20:47

Jon Duckworth is a legend! Jon, my best man, has got me the position of Flash the Falcon, the Newcastle Falcons mascot, at the inaugural Guinness Premiership Final 2006 at Twickenham. Duties include the Furry Mascot Dance-off before the game and the Furry Mascot rugby 7's at halftime. I'm hoping that my adventures as Vince Kong will adequately prepare me for the role but I don't want to let Newcastle Falcons down, so I've put myself through a rigorous physical and mental training program to get ready and in shape for the big day. The programme was introduced tonight, with a full day planned tomorrow! Exercise To get those leg muscles back in shape, I've just been on a 6km bike ride. I followed this up with 10 press up's and 20 sit-up's, not a great deal but it's just day one. I've also run around the flat like an idiot for a few minutes, but I normally do that so not sure it counts. Diet I've adjusted my diet for the big event, gone are the pies and the lager, repla...

Flash the Falcon - 4 days to go

2006-05-23 13:20:47

Jon Duckworth is a legend! Jon, my best man, has got me the position of Flash the Falcon, the Newcastle Falcons mascot, at the inaugural Guinness Premiership Final 2006 at Twickenham....

Vince Kong at the pub quiz

2006-04-18 19:29:34

Each week we look forward to heading to the local pub quiz with our neighbours. It's been a long while since my last gorilla outing, so this week I decided to bring along a special guest, none other than Vince Kong himself! We meet up with everyone in the hallway outside all our front doors. For a change, I feel a little out of place, I put this down to me being the only one dressed as a gorilla. We make our way outside and off down towards the pub. I'm getting quite used to the little sniggers and looks of disbelieve now, so when we stopped at the cash point, I had no problems waiting patiently and waving to the odd car or person on a bus. Normally, little sniggers are about as far as it goes, but when we got into the pub (The Cabbage Patch in Twickenham), I'm sure I heard an impressive belly laugh from the far side of the bar. The staff were very accommodating and did not impose the no-pets rule mentioned on the door, although I did have to promise not to pee on the floor or s...

Vince Kong at the pub quiz

2006-04-18 12:29:34

Cup of tea challenge

2006-04-12 09:36:03

This time when I headed off, I thought I would set a challenge for everyone on my out of office to see who could come up with the best email. We had a winner as well! Hello there! Nice! Very nice!! I am of course referring to your great email. Not that I’ve read it, how could I, I’m not here! But I will read it. The moment I get back it’ll be the first email I open, unless someone has sent a better one than yours that is, in which case I’ll open theirs first! In fact, perhaps that could be a great competition, who can send me the best email! The winner will get a cup of tea or coffee – you choose! Mind you, I could enter myself and win the free cup of tea, but can you really see me on my day off, writing silly emails to myself in order to win something that I’ll have to make anyway? Hummm, maybe it’s best not to answer that. So until Thursday, tally ho! Vince. And the best email was I did get a few entries but there was a clear winner,...

Cup of tea challenge

2006-04-12 02:36:03

This time when I headed off, I thought I would set a challenge for everyone on my out of office to see who could come up with the best email. We had a winner as well!...

Vince Kong gets a haircut

2006-02-26 21:01:36

This week, I thought I'd dress as a gorilla and take myself around the various hairdressers and barbers around Twickenham. It turned out to be a lot of fun! Dan kindly agree to be the photographer again and early on Saturday morning, we set off. Twickenham high street has recently acquired a Phones 4 U mobile phone shop, and despite the fact that I was dressed as a gorilla, the salesman in the street still tried to sell me a phone, almost shoving me into the shop. I protested saying that my gorilla fingers were too big for mobile phone and quickly hurried on. We reached the first barbers shop with the plan that I was just going to walk in there and sit down, and we'll see what happens from there. The shop was quite busy but I managed to get a seat and just sat and waited. Nothing happened, people went about their business, it was like I was just another customer. I tried a bit of banter but they wouldn't bite, so we headed off very disappointed. We didn't stay disappointed f...

Vince Kong gets a haircut

2006-02-26 14:01:36

This week, I thought I'd dress as a gorilla and take myself around the various hairdressers and barbers around Twickenham. It turned out to be a lot of fun!...

Music area added to site

2006-02-22 19:20:20

World of Vince.com has a new music area, hooray! The music area contains details of all the songs from all the CD’s I’ve bought over the years. Each song is rated out of five and those ratings are combined to give an overall percentage for the album and the artist, for example, 78 would indicate that the album or artist got 78%. I hope it’s pretty obvious how to navigate around the music area, or if you prefer using RSS and the like, then we’ve got and feeds for you, each will list the last ten albums added. Also, on the right of each page is a random album plucked from the music area, just to help you on your way! But don't hang around waiting for Busted or McFly to turn up, they're not in there! The Technology All my MP3’s are stored on a 40GB iRiver H140 MP3 player (a direct competitor to the 40GB iPod’s) and I use Apple's iTunes to play and rate my tunes. Both iRiver and Apple should be extremely proud, as both these products are exc...

Music area added to site

2006-02-22 19:20:20

World of Vince.com has a new music area, hooray! The music area contains details of all the songs from all the CD’s I’ve bought over the years....

Baked bean pilots

2006-02-16 11:55:12

Hello there, Thanks for your great message, loving the colours and the fonts and the words and everything about it, although did you really need to add that amount of punctuation?!?!?!! Anyway, I'm currently away on a mission to train baked beans to become better pilots on long-haul flights. I'm sure you'll agree that on a local flight, or one lasting about two hours, your average baked bean pilot is more than capable and does a great job. However on flights to America and the Far East, they are frankly not up to the job and you're much better using a potato or a gherkin. Not for much longer though! I hope that my new generation of baked beans will soon prove to be excellent pilots and that you not only enjoy flying with them, but you'll really enjoy their company as well and would be more than happy to go for a beer with them afterwards! Here's to baked beans then! Hip hip, Hooray! Oh, and this should only take a weekend so I'll see you on Monday! Cheerio! Vince....