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| It\'s a Funny Thing... |
| It's a funny thing... is a mostly daily commentary on topics ranging from everyday events to international crises. The incredibly large and well-paid staff at It's a Funny Thing... has never believed that staggering ignorance should be an impediment to the exploration of complex and thought-provoking issues. The Editor and Chief of IAFT is Don Lewis. He currently writes for Back Home Magazine. |
| Language: English |
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Statistics |
| Unique Visitors: 87 |
| Total Unique Visitors: 779985 |
| Visitors Out: 172 |
| Total Visitors Out: 2353 |
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| Stop Me or I'll Sing Again |
| 2009-03-08 14:38:51 |
Gosh! November 22nd? Has it been that long?Honestly. I was taking a little time off. A break to reinvigorate the fertile writing juices flowing through the Vas deferens tubes of my creative humor. Plus I'd been spending some time working closely with the Obama Administration on the Stimulus package until it came to my attention that they didn't really need another humorist.So. Yesterday I was doing some important research on inflation over at the Betty's Big'uns web page when I received a notice that a 'Brent Diggs' had posted a commentary on my Myspace page.Since I couldn't recall knowing a Brent Diggs, I initially assumed it was some kind of multi-level marketing scam. I mean, Brent Diggs ha ha! Obviously one of those randomly generated names like Sanjay Gupda that infest my email i...
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| Cow Boy |
| 2008-11-22 11:21:34 |
Just got a new cow in today. Last night actually. This one, unlike our Dexters (An old Irish breed, small and dual purpose: milk and meat.) is a Jersey who's sole existence in life as far human relations go, is to provide milk.Lots and lots of milk.Gallons of the stuff.Daily.She looks like a bone frame covered in skin attacked to a giant bag of milk.The problem of course is they forgot to install an efficient faucet on that bag. I suspect it's an English design thing. There are four nozzles or, and here I blush: teats, that one is supposed to yank on with a sort of top-down squeezing motion. This isn't as easy as it sounds, and its all complicated by the fact that the boney frame holding the sack keeps moving about. She doesn't seem to be doing it with malice, but she does seem to be incre...
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| I Ain't A'feared of Nobody! |
| 2008-10-23 11:43:41 |
I am pleased to announce that the Don Lewis for President Campaign is reaching new levels of excitement! As you can see from the map below, we obviously have grown exponentially in committed supporters. (Many of our supporters are not committed yet, but the Court Orders are pending.)And there is more good news. In a recent nation-wide survey, there are powerful indications of broad name recognition. Over ninety percent of respondents recognized the name Don. And nearly half as many knew someone with the last name of Lewis. (Margin of error: plus or minus 50 percent.)And thanks to our blood plasma sales fundraiser, we still have close to 35 dollars in the campaign war chest.While Obama and McCain continue to fall in the polls relative to my own meteoric or cometic rise as the case may be, I...
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| Taking a LEAP |
| 2008-10-15 23:56:21 |
Good day my fellow Americans. (And long-term visitors from sunny climes.)Having resumed my campaign, I want to take this opportunity to address the nation about our current financial troubles. As you are aware, Congress, initially bravely holding out against the insanity of massive deficit spending to the tune of 700 billion dollars finally agreed to a compromise proposal that only added an additional 150 billion dollars of vital economic stimulus expenditures like the Barney Frank Peace and Justice Bathhouse and the Strategic Congressional Re-election Reserve. Congressman Barney Frank, coming to grips with a deficit.However, it is entirely unfair to try to blame this boondoggle on the Congress or the White House. As I noted previously, the poor bear most of the responsibility for the comi...
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| Yet another Interlude. |
| 2008-10-06 09:08:01 |
Well Gang, I'm off to Oregon for a few days. Back on Wednesday. Don't wait up. I'm suspending my Campaign until then. I figure this is a good plan. Look what it did for McCain.Cheers,Don
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| A modest Proposal |
| 2008-09-28 00:33:10 |
Obviously it's time for me, as the Candidate of Last Resort and as a noted financial and economic expert, to speak to you, the Nation, about this whole credit and bank thingy.Everyone is pointing fingers, trying desperately to pass the buck. The Democrats say it's Bushs' fault. The Republicans are blaming it on the Democrats. McCain seems to suspect the North Vietnamese and Obama is looking suspiciously at bitter clingers like Palin. And everyone hates Wall Street: even Wall Street.But ask yourself this question. What one group, what one special interest has managed so far to escape the scrutiny that could reveal all?Of Course, I'm referring to "The Poor".I know what you're thinking. "Don" you say, "You've got to get back on your meds. The Poor just don't have the political and economic c...
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| All's Faire |
| 2008-09-23 22:30:58 |
Just got back from my Renaissance Faire. Actually, it's not mine. It belongs to someone else. I just run it while it's on the ground.Hmmm? A Renaissance Faire? Well. It's a bit like a craft fair. And a Grateful Dead concert. And a fairy ring. Or the path to heaven or the road to hell. Or the one in between. Or nothing like any of those. I've been intimately associated with this particular Ren Faire, the Shrewsbury Renaissance Faire in Oregon for the past 15 years. It occurs on the second weekend of September in the aptly named Kings Valley.Ren Faires come in all sizes. I've got a booth in the Kansas City Renaissance Faire which runs for seven weekends right about now and sees a couple of hundred thousand visitors. And the Shrewsbury, well the Shrewsbury Renaissance Faire is only a single w...
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| Thanks for the Help |
| 2008-09-19 00:34:32 |
Well I've nearly got the dust out of my lungs and the swelling of my eyes is finally decreasing.As previously mentioned, I just finished up my annual stint at the Shrewsbury Renaissance Faire in Kings Valley, Oregon.While I was away I was fortunate enough to have my blog kept alive by three of the funniest bloggers I know.Before I start my own writing up again, I want to take the time to thank:Chris Cameron of Angry Seafood for providing my multinational corporation, DONCO Inc. with a new series of products sure to help us maintain our position as a world leader in whoopee cushion technology. Brent Diggs, late of The Ominous Comma and Danger Couch who tried mightily to pump up another of my concerns, Don Lewis Designs. (Which is temporarily closed due to my frantically sending all of my ...
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| Guest-Posting Without a Net. Part 3. LOBO at Predator Press |
| 2008-09-15 20:00:01 |
IDAHO IN DA HOUSE
Predator Press
[LOBO]
Previous attempts to infiltrate DONCO Headquarters have all been thwarted.
"Who are you sir," said the DONCO security guard. "And where do you think you're going with those cinderblocks and pointy sticks? You'll deflate the empire!"
"You don't need to see my identification," I says, coolly waving my hand.
"I don't need to see your identification?"
"These aren't the droids you're looking for."
"Sir," says the guard. "The Jedi Mind Trick only works on the weak minded."
"The Jedi Mind Trick only works on the weak minded," I repeat.
"Now go on about your business," he says.
***
I woke up at Denny's.
-And someone had stolen my cinderblocks and pointy sticks!
Maybe I'm going about this all wrong, I'm thinking. I mean I have been wrong before.
"No I haven't," I point out.
Wait. Is this Greg? I'm scheduled for an inner-dialogue with Greg here..
"No. This is LOBO."
Well why ...
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| Guest-Posting Wthout a Net. Part 2. Brent Diggs |
| 2008-09-12 22:00:01 |
Temporal Security
As a concerned citizen of the world, you are no doubt aware of the many threats posed by the advent of time travel.*
Thanks to the diligent efforts of Hollywood, even the most scientifically illiterate individuals are well versed in the some of the top dangers set to emanate from the future: angry cyborgs, alien ninjas, and lazy college students looking for a little less history to study.**
Every survivalist worth his or her sodium content is now ready for such potential onslaughts, but what separates the dedicated from the dilettante and the professional from the peon is this:
How well are you prepared to handle threats from the past?
That's right, the past.
You see, the most insidious thing about time travel, among a long and highly competitive list of evils, is that you never know when exactly in the timestream it's going to turn up or from whence it will have arrived.***
For example what if a surly Viking warrior were to appear upon on your doorstep, would ...
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