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Statistics |
| Unique Visitors: 152 |
| Total Unique Visitors: 99317 |
| Visitors Out: 892 |
| Total Visitors Out: 892 |
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| Adult jokes - bags |
| 2008-09-23 13:14:31 |
There was this woman who had bags under her eyes and wanted to get them removed so she could look younger so she went to a plastic surgeon. She tells the doctor I cant get rid of these bags please help me. The doctor says he is gonna try and new experimental technique on her. He will put a crank in the back of her head and when she sees bags under her eyes she's supposed to crank it and the bags will go away. So she gets this crank put in her head and leaves. It works and works for a while until one day she cant get rid of these bags under her eyes. She cranks and cranks as hard as she can but they just wont go away. So she goes to the doctor. She says to the doctor: "Doctor, this was working for a while, but I cant seem to get rid of these bags under my eyes." The doctor replies: "Lady those aren't bags... those are your tits!"All she had to say was, "Now that would explain why I have this goatee."
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| Husband Wife jokes - two hours |
| 2008-09-22 22:38:58 |
Did you hear about the fellow that was talking to his buddy, when he said, "I don't know what to get my wife for her birthday. She has everything, and besides, she can afford to buy anything she wants. So, I'm stumped." His buddy said, "I have an idea. Why don't you make up a certificate that says she can have two hours of great sex, any way she wants it. She'll probably be thrilled!" So the first fella did just that. The next day his buddy asked, "Well, did you take my suggestion? How did it turn out?" "She loved it. She jumped up, thanked me, kissed me on the mouth, and ran out the door yelling, 'I'll see you in two hours'."
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| Dirty blonde jokes - roll of the dice |
| 2008-09-22 12:15:26 |
Two bored casino dealers are waiting at the crap table. A very attractive blonde woman arrived and bet twenty thousand dollars ($20,000) on a single roll of the dice. She said, "I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm completely nude."With that, she stripped from the neck down, rolled the dice and yelled, "Come on, baby, Mama needs new clothes!" As the dice came to a stop she jumped up and down and squealed... "YES! YES! I WON, I WON!" She hugged each of the dealers and then picked up her winnings and her clothes and quickly departed... The dealers stared at each other dumbfounded. Finally, one of them asked, "What did she roll?" The other answered,"I don't know - I thought you were watching."
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| Funny Jokes - tall chick with a big ass |
| 2008-09-19 23:30:42 |
A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. The waitress asks them for their orders. The man says, 'A hamburger, fries and a coke,' and turns to the ostrich, 'What's yours?' 'I'll have the same,' says the ostrich. A short time later the waitress returns with the order. 'That will be $9.40 please,' and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change for payment. The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, 'A hamburger, fries and a coke.' The ostrich says, 'I'll have the same.' Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change. This becomes routine until the two enter again. 'The usual?' asks the waitress. 'No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato and a salad,' says the man. 'Same,' says the os...
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| Jokes - envelopes |
| 2008-09-19 10:07:44 |
A new manager spends a week at his new office with the manager he is replacing.On the last day the departing manager tells him, "I have left three numbered envelopes in the desk drawer. Open an envelope if you encounter a crisis you can't solve."Three months down the track there is major drama, everything goes wrong - the usual stuff - and the manager feels very threatened by it all.He remembers the parting words of his predecessor and opens the first envelope. The message inside says "Blame your predecessor!" He does this and gets off the hook.About half a year later, the company is experiencing a dip in sales, combined with serious product problems.The manager quickly opens the second envelope. The message read, "Reorganize!"This he does, and the company quickly rebounds.Three months later, at his next crisis, he opens the third envelope. The message inside says, "Prepare three envelopes"
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| Santabanta Jokes - mental deficiency |
| 2008-09-18 11:55:40 |
A noted psychiatrist was a guest at a party and his host, Banta, naturally broached the subject in which the doctor was most at ease."Would you mind telling me, Doctor," Banta asked "how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?""Nothing is easier," he replied. "You ask him a simple question which everyone should answer with no trouble. If he hesitates, that puts you on the track.""What sort of question?""Well, you might ask him, 'Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one?'Banta thought for a moment, and then said with a nervous laugh, "You wouldn't happen to have another example would you? I must confess I don't know much about history."
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| Adult Jokes - Salary raise |
| 2008-09-17 11:55:47 |
There was a preacher whose wife was expecting a baby. The preacher went to the congregation and asked for a raise.After much consideration and discussion, they passed a rule that whenever the preacher's family expanded, so would his paycheck.After six children, this started to get expensive and the congregation decided to hold another meeting to discuss the preacher's salary.There was much yelling and bickering about how much the clergyman's additional children were costing the church.Finally, the preacher got up and spoke to the crowd, "Having children is an act of God!"Silence fell upon the congregation. In the back of the room a little old lady stood up and in her frail voice said, "Snow and rain are also acts of God, but when we get too much, we wear rubbers!"
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| Adult jokes - cigarette after sex |
| 2008-09-16 10:30:40 |
A young couple had been married for a couple of weeks, and the man was always after his wife to quit smoking. One afternoon, she lit up after some lovemaking, and he said, "You really ought to quit." She, getting tired of his nagging, said, "I really enjoy a good cigarette after sex." He replied, "But they stunt your growth." She asked if he ever smoked, and he replied that he never had. Smiling and lifting her gaze to his groin, she said, "So, what's your excuse?"
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| Funny Jokes - crazy driver |
| 2008-09-15 22:17:36 |
A woman is watching the news on TV and they are reporting live from a helicopter about a man driving down the highway going the wrong way. All the other cars are swerving all over the place trying to avoid hitting this guy. She calls her husband to warn him as he knows that he travels on that highway at this time. She says to him, "There's this crazy driver on the highway going the wrong direction." He replies emphatically, "Just one, hell there's a whole bunch of them going the wrong way."
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| Johnny jokes - proper grammar |
| 2008-09-15 04:30:10 |
One day, during a lesson on proper grammar, the teacher asked the class for a show of hands from those who could use the word "beautiful" in the same sentence twice.First, she called on Little Mona, who responded with, "My father bought my mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it.""Very good, Mona," replied the teacher. She then called on Michael. "My mommy planned a beautiful banquet and it turned out beautifully," he said."Excellent, Michael!"Then, the teacher called on Little Johnny...Last night, during supper, my sister told my father that she was pregnant, and he said, "Beautiful, just f*%@# beautiful!"
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| men women jokes - Romantic couple |
| 2008-09-14 01:20:12 |
An older couple were lying in bed one night. The husband was falling asleep but the wife felt romantic and wanted to talk. She said, "You use to hold my hand when we were courting." Wearily he reached across, held her hand for a second and tried to get back to ep.sle A few moments later she said, "Then you used to kiss me." Mildly irritated, he reached across, gave her a peck on the cheek and settled down to sleep. Thirty seconds later she said, "Then you use to bite my neck." Angrily, he threw back the bed clothes and got out of bed. "Where are you going ?" she asked. "To get my teeth!"
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| Short jokes - Husbund wife jokes |
| 2008-09-13 08:25:46 |
You have two choices in life:You can stay single and be miserable,or get married and wish you were dead.*************At a cocktail party, one woman said to another,'Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?''Yes, I am. I married the wrong man.'*************A lady inserted an ad in the classifieds:'Husband Wanted'.Next day she received a hundred letters.They all said the same thing:'You can have mine.'*************When a woman steals your husband,there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.******************A little boy asked his father,'Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?'Father replied, 'I don't know son, I'm still paying.'**************A young son asked,'Is it true Dad, that in some parts of Africaa man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?'Dad repl...
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| Men Women jokes - disorder |
| 2008-09-11 13:06:21 |
A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor’s office. After his checkup, the doctor called the wife into his office alone. He said, “Your husband is suffering from a very severe stress disorder. If you don’t do the following, your husband will surely die.” The doctor continued, “Each morning, fix him a healthy breakfast. Be pleasant at all times. For lunch make him a nutritious meal. For dinner prepare an especially nice meal for him. Don’t burden him with chores. Don’t discuss your problems with him, it will only make his stress worse. No nagging. And most importantly, make love with your husband several times a week. If you can do this for the next 10 months to a year, I think your husband will regain his health completely.” On the way home, the husband asked his wife. “What did the doctor say?” To which his wife responded, “He said you’re going to die.”
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| Men womwn jokes - lurid past |
| 2008-09-09 11:28:01 |
After three years of marriage, Kim was still questioning her husband about his lurid past."C'mon, tell me," she asked for the thousandth time, "how many women have you slept with?""Baby," he protested, "if I told you, you'd throw a fit".Kim promised she wouldn't get angry, and convinced her hubby to tell her."Okay," he said, "One, two, three, four, five, six, seven - then there's you - nine, ten, 11, 12, 13.."humor
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| Blonde Jokes - Blonde Jokes |
| 2008-09-09 10:36:55 |
What did the blonde say when she saw the sign in front of the YMCA?"Look! They spelled MACY'S wrong!Why can't blondes take coffee breaks?They're too hard to retrain.What do you call 9 blondes standing in a circle?A dope ring.Why can't blondes be pharmacists?Because they can't fit the bottle in the typewriter.What's the definition of eternity?4 blondes at a 4-way stopWhat do you call five blondes at the bottom of the ocean?An air pocket.Why do blondes have TGIF on their shirts?"This goes in front"Two blondes were walking through the woods and they came to some tracks. The 1st blonde said,"These look like deer tracks,"and the other one said , " No,they look like moose tracks". They argued until the train hit them.Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door to their Mercedes w...
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| Adult Jokes - Letter from Husband |
| 2008-09-06 09:01:41 |
TO MY DEAR WIFE:During the past year I have tried to make love to you 365 times. I havesucceeded 36 times,which is an average of once every ten days. The followingis a list of why I did not succeed more often:54 times the sheets were clean17 times it was too late49 times you were too tired20 times it was too hot15 times you pretended to be asleep22 times you had a headache17 times you were afraid of waking the baby16 times you said you were too sore12 times it was the wrong time of the month19 times you had to get up early9 times you said weren't in the mood7 times you were sunburned6 times you were watching the late show5 times you didn't want to muss your new hair-do3 times you said the neighbors would hear us9 times you said your mother would hear usOf the 36 times I did succeed, the ac...
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| Chutkule - Short jokes |
| 2008-09-04 11:17:00 |
Munna bhai: agar bina daton ka kuta kate to kya karna chahiye?Circuit: simple hai na bhai , bina sui ke injection lena chahiye.************ ********* **Bikhari: 50 paise de de maine 3 din se khana nahin khaya hai.Kanjoos: 10 rupaye dunga, pahele ye bata 50 paise mein khana kahan milta hai.************ ********* *******Santa: Yaar bachpan mein 20 male se gir gaya tha.Banta: to fir bach gaya ya mar gaya?Santa: yaad nahin hai bahut purani baat hai.************ ********* ****Boy: mom, aaj mera dost ghar aa raha hai….ghar ke sab khilone chhupa de.Mom: tera dost chor hai kya?Boy: nahin, woh apne khilone pahechan lega.************ *********In aptitude test…River Kaveri is in which state?Sardar: liquid state.************ ********* ****INTERVIEW : Imagine, in a closed room, how can you escape i...
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| Funny Jokes - four engineers traveling in a car |
| 2008-09-03 01:44:06 |
There are four engineers traveling in a car; a mechanical engineer, a chemical engineer, an electrical engineer and a computer engineer. The car breaks down."Sounds to me as if the pistons have seized. We'll have to strip down the engine before we can get the car working again", says the mechanical engineer."Well", says the chemical engineer, "it sounded to me as if the fuel might be contaminated. I think we should clear out the fuel system.""I thought it might be an grounding problem", says the electrical engineer, "or maybe a faulty plug lead."They all turn to the computer engineer who has said nothing and say: "Well, what do you think?" "Ummm perhaps if we all get out of the car and get back in again?"
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| Adult jokes - Cadillac people |
| 2008-09-01 12:29:19 |
A man and his wife were driving through country on his way from New York to California. Looking at his fuel gauge, he decided to stop at the next gasoline station and fill up. About 15 minutes later, he spots a Mobil station and pulls over to the high octane pump."What can I do for y'all?" asks the attendant. "Fill `er up with high test," replies the driver. While the attendant is filling up the tank, he's looking the car up and down. "What kinda car is this?" he asks. "I never seen one like it before." "Well," responds the driver, his chest swelling up with pride, "this, my boy is a 1999 Cadillac DeVille.""What all's it got in it?" asks the attendant. "Well," says the driver, "it has everything. It's loaded with power steering, power seats, power sun roof, power mirrors, AM/FM radio with ...
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| Funny Jokes - My wife is up there |
| 2008-09-01 12:26:48 |
A guy stood over his tee shot for what seemed an eternity, looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed... driving his partner nuts.Finally his exasperated partner says, "What the hell is taking so long? Hit the damned ball!"The guy answers, "My wife is up there watching me from the clubhouse. I want to make this a perfect shot.""Give me a break! You don't stand a snowball's chance in hell of hitting her from here."
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| Funny Jokes - what do you think? |
| 2008-08-31 23:32:33 |
For two solid hours, the lady sitting next to a man on an airplane had told him about her grandchildren.She had even produced a plastic-foldout photo album of all nine of the children.She finally realized that she had dominated the entire conversation on her grandchildren."Oh, I've done all the talking, and I'm so sorry. I know you certainlyhave something to say. Please, tell me... what do you think of mygrandchildren?"
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| Funny jokes - Hot air |
| 2008-08-31 01:43:49 |
A man in a hot air balloon realised he was lost. He reduced altitude and spotted a woman below. He descended a bit more and shouted, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am." The woman below replied, "You are in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You are between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude." "You must be an engineer," said the balloonist. "I am," replied the woman. "How did you know?" "Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is I am still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help so far." The woman below responded, "You must b...
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| Funny Jokes - Buttler English |
| 2008-08-31 01:20:19 |
I talk, he talk; Why do you middle middle talk?(beech, beech = middle, middle)"Hey, u guys, please keep quiet. The president is rotating outside""Donot smoke and spoil the botany of ur body"" Open the windows, open the windows, let the climate come in "" Why are you naat filupping the blanks ? "Advice to father thinking about whether he should let his daughter continue her studiesor get her married : " Vell, if you wantu study her, then study her. If you want u marry her, thenmarry her ."Prof to students hanging around the corridors during exams :" Do not revolve in the corridors in front of the examinations "" Don't talk like that in front of my back """Dont stand in front of my back"" Louly hair cutting. Hair cutting, current drying . No shock. "" Florida paan shop. Prop: Raju . B.A, M.A...
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| Funny jokes - Bathtub Test |
| 2008-08-30 23:22:58 |
It doesn't hurt to take a hard look at yourself from time to time, and this should help get you started. During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the Director what the criterion was which defined whether or not a patient should be institutionalized. "Well," said the Director, "we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to empty the bathtub." "Oh, I understand," said the visitor. "A normal person would use the bucket because it's bigger than the spoon or the teacup. "No." said the Director, "A normal person would pull the plug.Do you want a bed near the window?"
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| Blonde Joke - look out for cops |
| 2008-08-30 12:51:55 |
A blonde and a brunette are out driving, and the brunette tells the blonde to look out for cops - especially cops with their lights on. After they've been driving for a while, the brunette asks the blonde if she's seen any cops. "Yes," says the blonde. "Are their lights on?" The blonde has to think for a moment, then says, "Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No."
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| Chutkule - american born Desi |
| 2008-08-30 12:37:58 |
An american born Desi returned to India and hired a tourist cab for sight seeing. When taken to the Taj Mahal in Agra, he asked how many years it took to build it. The guide replied 20 years. The American desi remarked You guys are lazy, in America we can build some thing like this in 5 years. At Red Fort in Dehli he asked the same question. The guide reduced the period to impress him and said Ten years. Only ten years The American Desi retorted: Didn’t I say you guys are slow workers! In America we could have built it in 2 1/2 years. Same story everywhere. He admired the places but reduced the period to 1/4th. The guide got irritated by this young American Desi. Next day when they were near Qutab Minar the American Desi asked what is that tower? The guide replied I ‘ll have to go and find out. When I was passing by this side last evening there was nothing here.
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| Adult jokes - patient of Dr. Paul |
| 2008-08-29 23:07:12 |
A flat-chested young lady went to Dr. Paul about enlarging her tiny breasts. Dr. Paul advised her, "Every day after your shower rub your chest and say, "Scooby doobie doobies, I want bigger boobies." She did this faithfully for several months and it worked! She grew terrific D-cup boobs! One morning she was running late, got on the bus and in a panic realised she had forgotten her morning ritual. Frightened she might lose her lovely boobs if she didn’t recite the little rhyme, she stood right there in the middle aisle of the bus closed her eyes and said, "Scooby doobie doobies, I want bigger boobies." A guy sitting nearby looked at her, "By any chance, are you a patient of Dr. Paul ’s?" "Why, yes I am... How did you know?" He leaned closer, winked and whispered, "Hickory dickory dock..."
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| Funny SMS - Flirt sms |
| 2008-08-28 11:57:33 |
• God determines who walks into your life. You decide who stays & who walks out. Send this to people you never want to lose, I just did... • Loving you could take my life, but when I look into your eyes, I know you're worth that sacrifice! • Heaven is the place where I would be, the day you would stop loving me! • Some people have nice eyes... some people have nice smile, others have nice faces, but you have all of them with a nice heart! • People die younger because God loves them so much. But you are still on earth... because there is someone who loves you more than God. • If u find ur world as a sky and ur friends as STARS, and if U don't find me among them, dont worrry! I've just been fallen to make ur wish come true. • Ur precious love has turned my life completely around, I feel like I'm walking but my feet don't seem to touch the ground!
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| Santabanta jokes - Ransom |
| 2008-08-28 10:58:11 |
Having snuck out with a very cute young woman that he met at a party, Banta, exhausted from hours of hot sex, woke up at her apartment at 3 A.M."Oh God!" Banta thought, "Jeeto's gonna kill me!"Trying to figure out how he would explain this to Jenny without getting whacked with a frying pan, inspiration struck first.Banta dashed out to the nearest pay phone, dialed his home number quickly, and breathlessly said, "Jeeto, Jeeto! Don't pay the ransom!!!I escaped!!!"
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| Blonde jokes - I can't work |
| 2008-08-28 10:28:12 |
I urgently needed a few days off work, but I knew the Boss would not allow me to take leave. I thought that maybe if I acted "CRAZY" then he would tell me to take a few days off.So I hung upside down on the ceiling and made funny noises. My co-worker (who's a blonde) asked me what I was doing. I told her that I was pretending to be a light bulb so that the Boss would think I was "CRAZY" and give me a few days off.A few minutes later the Boss came into the office and asked, "What are you doing?"I told him I was a light bulb.He said, "You are clearly stressed out. Go home and recuperate for a couple of days."I jumped down and walked out of the office.When my co-worker (the blonde) followed me, the Boss asked her, "And where do you think you're going?"She said, "I'm going home too, I can't work in the dark."
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| Santabanta Jokes - Doctor Banta |
| 2008-08-27 23:04:59 |
A Doctor wanted to get off work and go hunting, so he approached his assistant, "Banta, I am going hunting tomorrow and don't want to close the clinic. I want you to take care of the clinic and take care of all of our patients"."Yes, sir!!!" answers Banta.The doctor goes hunting and returns the following day and asks, "So, Banta, How was your day?" Banta told him that he took care of three patients."The first one had a Headache so I gave him Analgin.""Bravo Mate, and the second one?" asks the doctor."The second one had running nose and I gave him Coldarin, sir" says Banta."Bravo, bravo! You're good at this and what about the third one?" asks the doctor."Sir, I was sitting here and suddenly the door opens and a woman enters like a flame, she undresses herself, taking off everything including her bra and her panties and lies down on the table and shouts:HELP ME! For 5 years I have not seen any man!!!!!"And what did you do Banta?" asks the doctor."I put drops in her eyes!!!
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| Adult jokes - 16 Reasons To Date Horseback |
| 2008-08-27 12:57:29 |
16 Reasons To Date A Horse Rider1.We have 4 speeds and many positions2.We wear tight pants and tall boots3.We love getting dirty4.We know how to ride our mounts5.We perform well with animals6.We like to be in control7.We’ll ride it for hours8.We know how to handle a big girth9.We get off easy10.We’re always on top11.We like it rough12.We have our legs spread all day long13.We love using whips14.Stradling is our natural position15.We don’t mind being bucked around16.Endurance riders do it longer
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| Blonde jokes - Bet is bet |
| 2008-08-26 12:06:16 |
A blonde and a redhead met for dinner after work and were watching the 6 o'clock news. A man was shown threatening to jump from the Brooklyn Bridge. The blonde bet the redhead $50 that he wouldn't jump, and the redhead replied, "I'll take that bet!"Anyway, sure enough, he jumped, so the blonde gave the redhead the $50 she owned. The redhead said, "I can't take this, you're my friend." The blonde said, "No. A bet's a bet."So the redhead said, "Listen, I have to admit, I saw this one on the 5 o'clock news, so I can't take your money." The blonde replied, "Well, so did I, but I never thought he'd jump again!"
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| Adult jokes - Jam Sandwich |
| 2008-08-26 10:16:31 |
A guy says to his wife, "I'm in the mood for a 69er."She says, "It's that time of the month, but if you don't care, I don't care."They go into the bedroom, and are 69'ing like mad dogs when the doorbell rings.She says, "Answer the door."He says, "But my face is a mess."She says, "It's just the postman. Answer the door, and if he says anything, just tell him you were eating a jam sandwich."He opens the door and says, "I'm sorry about my mouth, I was eating a jam sandwich."The mailman says, "I wasn't looking at the jam on your mouth...I was looking at the peanut butter on your forehead."
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| Funny Jokes - Cue Ball |
| 2008-08-26 09:25:13 |
A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and while he's drinking, the monkey starts jumping all over the place. The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them, then grabs some sliced limes and eats them, then jumps up on the pool table, grabs the cue ball, sticks it in his mouth and swallows it whole. The bartender screams at the guy, "Did you see what your monkey just did?" The guy says, "No, what?" "He just ate the cue ball off my pool table - whole!"says the bartender. "Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replies the patron. "He eats everything in sight, the little twerp. I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff." He finishes his drink, pays his bill, and leaves. Two weeks later he's in the bar again, and he has his monkey with him. He orders a drink and the monkey ...
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| Religon Jokes - selling Bibles |
| 2008-08-24 10:23:07 |
While checking the church storeroom, the pastor discovered several cases of new Bibles that never had been opened and distributed.So at his Sunday sermon, he asked for three volunteers from the congregation who would be willing to sell the Bibles door-to-door for $10 each to raise money for the church. Jack, Paul, and Louie all raised their hands to volunteer for the task.The minister knew that Jack and Paul earned their living as salesmen and were likely capable of selling some Bibles. But he had serious doubts about Louie, a local farmer who always had kept to himself because he was embarrassed by his speech impediment. Poor Louie stuttered badly. But because he didn't want to discourage Louie, the minister decided to let him try anyway.He sent the three of them away with the backseats o...
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| Funny Jokes - Best Consultant |
| 2008-08-24 06:53:25 |
Doctor Simon is known throughout London as one of the best consultants on arthritis. He always has a waiting room full of people who need his advice and specialist treatment.One day, an elderly lady, slowly struggles into his waiting room. She is completely bent over andleans heavily on her walking stick. A chair is found for her.Eventually, her turn comes to go into Doctor Simon’s office.15 minutes later, to everyone’s surprise, she comes briskly out of his room walking almost upright. She is holding her head high and has a smile on her face.A woman in the waiting room says, "It's unbelievable, a miracle even. You walk in bent in half and now you walk out erect. What a fantastic doctor he is. Tell me, what did DoctorSimon do to you?""Miracle, shmiracle, he just gave me a longer walking stick."
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| Funny Jokes - Problum with Women |
| 2008-08-24 06:15:19 |
If you kiss her, you are not a gentlemanIf you don’t, you are not a manIf you praise her, she thinks you are lyingIf you don’t, you are good for nothingIf you agree to all her likes, you are a wimpIf you don’t, you are not understandingIf you visit her often,she thinks it is boringIf you don’t , she accuses you of double-crossingIf you are well dressed, she says you are a playboyIf you don’t , you are a dull boyIf you are jealous, she says it’s badIf you don’t, she thinks you do not love herIf you attempt a romance, she says you didn’t respect herIf you don’t, she thinks you do not like herIf you are a minute late, she complains it’s hard to waitIf she is late, she says that’s a girl’s wayIf you visit another man, you’re not putting in “quality time”If she is ...
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| Short Funny Jokes - Sardar Jokes |
| 2008-08-24 00:16:47 |
Sardar declares:I will never marry in my life andI'll give same advice to my children also*************************************************SARDAR talking on cell.2ND SARDAR: kis se baat kar raho ho.1ST: biwi se.....2ND: itne... pyar se....?1ST: tumhari hai. . .*****************************************A donkey kicked sardar & ran awaysardar ran to catch the donkey. He saw a zebra & started beating it & said 'SALA Tracksuit pahan ke dhoka de raha hai'.****************************************sardar: Darling, years ago u had a figure like Coke bottle.Jeeto: Yes darling I still do, only differnece is earlier it was 300mlnow it's 1.5 ltr.***************************************teacher: make a sentence in which 1 word repeated 4 timessardar: lara dutta marries brian lara and she become...
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| Short Funny jokes - Short jokes |
| 2008-08-23 12:39:53 |
A girl was yelling in the Church after the Chapel: "Oh God! Please make Moscow the Capital of China!"The priest inquired: "Why must you pray so, my child?"Girl: "That's what I've written in my answer sheet in the examination!"******************************A blind man was waiting to cross the road when his guide dog peed onhis leg. He reached into his pocket and took out a biscuit for the dog.A passer by who'd seen everything remarked: "That's very tolerant of you after what he just did." "Not really," came the reply. "I'm just finding out where his mouth is, so I can kick him."*****************************An American report: We crossed chickens with cows. The new breed simultaneously produces milk, meat and eggs.Report from France: We crossed flies and bees. The hybrid flies over the trash fields and produces honey.Report from Russia: We crossed a melon with cockroaches. When you cut this melon, seeds run away by themselves.
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