|
| |
| |
| |
|
Statistics |
| Unique Visitors: 0 |
| Total Unique Visitors: 574 |
| Visitors Out: 2431 |
| Total Visitors Out: 2757 |
|
|
|
| |
|
|
| |
|
| Of skins and suits |
| 2008-09-16 08:27:51 |
From the journal…
It’s been six years now since I went to the Fringe with him and Andrew. Andrew’s now a successful headlining standup comedian. John’s now finally starting to get recognised for his music on an overdue scale. There is no greater pain than seeing friends succeed. After I read the review I spoke to [...]......
|
| |
|
| My Night with The Prostitute From Marseille |
| 2008-09-01 12:48:25 |
Ben Leto asks Josh Todd of Bark Cat Bark what year it is, why people in Paris don’t wear baseball caps and whether he’d like another Absinthe.
Josh Todd has started the day in what only the British would consider true Parisian style. It’s not yet lunchtime and he’s had, by his own admission, “plenty of [...]......
|
| |
|
| Homeless |
| 2008-07-31 04:02:05 |
Mother threw me out of the house on Tuesday night.
I’ve stopped and stared at that sentence for at least a minute now. It still doesn’t make any sense. She woke me up at about 10pm, screaming at me - demanding to know what my problem was before telling me that I should leave. Earlier [...]......
|
| |
|
| Let them eat toast |
| 2008-07-24 05:31:11 |
I’ve just remembered my toaster - a Russell Hobbs two decker. It was a present from my mum after I moved into my first flat in Highgate, now five years ago. My mum currently has a four decker here. I think such decadence has not been seen since Marie Antoinette.
The last time I saw [...]......
|
| |
|
| The Manic Depressive Merry-Go-Round |
| 2008-07-20 06:41:35 |
I’m not sure if it was intentional, but it is the first thing that greets you as you enter Bonkersfest. That and one of those stalls where if you lob enough bricks at a clown’s face you win a cuddly toy. I don’t need the incentive of a cuddly toy to hurl things at clowns. [...]......
|
| |
|
| Just so you know |
| 2008-07-18 06:26:11 |
I’ve never been very good at accommodating “constructive criticism”, but particularly from sources so plainly unqualified to offer it so abruptly. You’ll therefore excuse me if I take this opportunity to make a cup of tea and carry on with my day.......
|
| |
|
| Brand new day |
| 2008-07-16 06:10:38 |
Woke up this morning (at bang on 11:11 believe it or not) from a dream about being in my actor friend’s current play. It was a variation of one of those “everyone knows the lines except you” anxiety dreams, except everyone knew I didn’t know the lines at all - I was standing in at [...]......
|
| |
|
| A life told by early morning song lyrics |
| 2008-07-09 04:51:57 |
Doomsday. He’s not on the beach - but who cares anymore. The engines roar and I find myself alone, not even myself, the maple-leafed sign beside me revealing this is Dårlig Ulv Stranden. I got it all wrong. London and the hollow chimes of an unirradiated Big Ben already feel light years away, gongs for [...]......
|
| |
|
| The Misanthrope’s Manifesto |
| 2008-07-08 06:21:50 |
I don’t want to catch a falling star because nuclear fusion burns my skin.
I don’t want to share my life with you. Get your own life.
I don’t want my wildest dreams to come true because the other night I dreamt about clowns.
I don’t want to find myself because I’d just lose myself again.
I don’t want [...]......
|
| |
|
| Lovesick |
| 2008-07-05 04:36:49 |
But it was not until the 22nd century and the refinement of quantum theory to the point of application that such aspects of pathology were truly understood. Once physicists first observed the behaviour of particles that existed in a multidimensional and pantemporal state, physicians came to understand organisms that functioned in a distinctly similar manner; [...]......
|
| |
|
| Still fighting the jet lag |
| 2008-06-17 10:29:45 |
BEN is seated on the steps of the Vancouver Art Gallery smoking a cigarette. He is exhausted, having been walking the city all day and is still trying to ignore his body’s insistence that it really shouldn’t be so bright at the moment for what should be just gone midnight. A HOODIE suddenly approaches him…
HOODIE: [...]......
|
| |
|
| A very kind third rejection letter |
| 2008-06-13 07:36:24 |
… As I anticipated you write very well and the atmosphere you convey was sometimes all too dark for this reader. However, that merely shows that you know what you are doing. Nevertheless, I have no direct experience of handling fiction in this area and don’t have enough confidence in my ability to find a [...]......
|
| |
|
| The flip of a coin |
| 2008-06-08 17:49:29 |
I cannot begin to describe how utterly content I am with my life at the moment. And I write that sentence fully aware of my conceit and hubris in doing so.
You see, I recently deleted a post that began in precisely the same way, but went on to say the exact opposite. I was [...]......
|
| |
|
| I’d rather stay in bed |
| 2008-06-05 17:44:07 |
I can’t begin to describe how utterly arbitrary and purposeless my life feels. Every single act of volition is a lazy exercise in wasting time. But what happens if such exercise stops? What happens if I don’t waste time? The only answer - too much time.
I can’t even write this properly. I can’t even [...]......
|
| |
|
| Lessons learnt for the son I’ll never have |
| 2008-05-29 17:04:44 |
1) Don’t do that.
2) Music really does sound better through earphones.
3) The grass is always greener. Be happy with your lot, not unhappy over someone else’s.
4) Wear sunscreen.
5) Don’t bank with Abbey National. Ever. EVER. Unless of course you want to waste money, have high blood pressure and go grey before your time. In [...]......
|
| |
|
| How not to brainstorm a sitcom |
| 2008-05-26 07:04:12 |
An actual transcript…
BEN: You know you said just go for the zeitgeist - y’know, like Amy Winehouse - take something old and make it modern?
LITTLE ONE: Yeah.
BEN: Like, put a modern spin on it by throwing in a few swear words and talking about being wasted?
LITTLE ONE: Uh huh.
BEN: So how about ‘The Two Ronnies’, only more modern: ‘The [...]......
|
| |
|
| Morpheus reads Tim the Sheep |
| 2008-05-23 05:50:15 |
It happened again, somehow more as teenage viscera than the teenage innocence of before but no less warm in effect. Only there were three this time. One was a boy - a cheeky, impudent libertine. Another was an ex, tacitly competing with me for the libertine’s attention’s. And one, curiously, was a girl.
I know. [...]......
|
| |
|
| This is it, by childhood and home |
| 2008-05-20 14:37:29 |
fingers tense against the gnarled oak chest, clutching at drawers, scrambling, fumbling inside. i am blind, my vision having died in darkened rooms, blindfolded by dirty sheets and smothered by anything without an edge. paper cuts my skin as i claw within the dark for clues, for something soft and warm, familiar, breaking my knuckles [...]......
|
| |
|
| Nerd Joy |
| 2008-05-18 17:55:12 |
At last reunited with my faithful Kodak cable, I’ve been able to finally transfer the many photos that have been sitting idle on my camera for the past few months since moving.......
|
| |
|
| I heard a cow cough |
| 2008-04-23 04:43:55 |
a st andrews breakfast - two cups of coffee and two marlboro lights, looking at 9am as it trails warm pools in its cloak across the valley opposite. brecon has never looked so pretty as regina sings, and sings and sings, daffs dancing all around me like teenagers at a concert waving unsteady lighter flames. [...]......
|
| |
|
| Beasts of the Finished |
| 2008-04-21 17:20:14 |
13 chapters. 125,327 words. Two and a half years. And several grisly deaths, naturally.
How better to quietly celebrate actually finishing a novel for the first time, than listening to Together in Electric Dreams, drinking a can of Becks lager and gnawing a slab of chocolate?......
|
| |
|
| How to stay sane in West London |
| 2008-04-02 18:29:12 |
I’d like you to meet my new cellmate, Mr Chauncey Rapscallion. I found him lying facedown, half drunk behind the radiator. He says he likes it there, that the fluff is comfy and the heat stops him thinking about crows. He’s going to keep me company during the rest of my sentence. Tomorrow night we’re [...]......
|
| |
|
| Leaving Highgate |
| 2008-04-01 07:00:09 |
From the journal…
Friday 22nd: The first day of summer
I watch the leaves wave like abandoned wives beyond the glass as clouds roll majestically away behind them - moving west, always ever further west. I sit unblinking in my almost empty room and watch the world move, change and grow - the clouds cruising away like [...]......
|
| |
|
| The first time you discovered microphone feedback |
| 2008-03-17 16:53:14 |
read. just read. sit back with your feet up on white sheets and listen to owen. don’t fear the reaper. read, as you turn the pages of a tobacco-yellowed 1960s paperback just to feel them between your fingers. pretend you’re rich. pretend this is all just a novel and you’re holding your breath because you’re [...]......
|
| |
|
| Anniversary |
| 2008-03-04 02:41:38 |
Stupid things I remember about that love affair:
We met at a friend’s house. A huge house. I can’t remember the first thing who said to who, only that he was tired and wanted to go to bed, too polite to say so when I stopped him outside his room to talk to him. I had [...]......
|
| |
|
| Why do I keep a blog? |
| 2008-03-02 13:41:10 |
Saturday, 1st March, 1.43 pm - Highgate Wood
Deep in the wood. No one could find me here without looking for me. Who would look for me? Called Little One - wanted somewhere to go whilst strangers view my flat and remind me of what I’m doing, of where I’m trying to go, of how I [...]......
|
| |
|
| An earthquake in London? |
| 2008-02-26 19:10:17 |
1.10am The room just literally shook. Very gently, but very definitely. At first, with my quaint little history of petit mal and red wine, I thought it was just me, but a few other people say they felt something too.
Was that an Earthquake in England just now?
1.23am The BBC is now reporting this......
|
| |
|
| February Dregs |
| 2008-02-19 08:23:26 |
Miss Havisham: burned to death
Potter about. Diddle on work website. Scratch as iTunes peppers the day. Stare at the piles of unpacked books and unsorted clutter and feel like the end of university all over again. Door goes. Ignore it. Hear key at the door. Throw on dressing gown. Politely suggest to buzzarding estate agent [...]......
|
| |
|
| Blind Fate |
| 2008-02-17 18:22:57 |
Sometimes when we don’t want to hear the answer to a question, it’s easier not to ask it.
It doesn’t make the answer any easier to hear of course, regardless of whether you ask.......
|
| |
|
| Blog for life: You’re Not The Only One |
| 2008-02-10 13:57:21 |
The pretty Miss Peach has come up with a practical exercise for people who love the sound of their own keyboards. A small group of bloggers are putting together a book of short pieces by, surprisingly, other bloggers all over the world.
You’re Not The Only One will be a collection of submissions from blogkeepers [...]......
|
| |
|
| So long Camden Market |
| 2008-02-09 21:42:32 |
The cynic in me can’t help but think that the recent fire will conveniently pave the way for a total redevelopment of the existing market as a whole.......
|
| |
|
| With a kiss, with a sword |
| 2008-02-06 21:14:20 |
I saw you from the bus. You mouthed something - could have been anything. It looked like three words, but I pretended it was four, five maybe. Even two. I pretended I couldn’t see through the years of unwashed dirt, clumsy finger marks and breath smeared across the glass. I watched instead the city kick [...]......
|
| |
|
| Oh My Gods… |
| 2008-02-03 19:14:54 |
Now here is one thing I will certainly be watching at the cinema. The original series has also finally be scheduled for release in English on DVD this year. If you still don’t have a clue what I’m talking about, then watch the video below. To a certain generation: if you haven’t watched this since [...]......
|
| |
|
| How not to get a job |
| 2008-01-24 19:04:21 |
Sign on, as usual. Have fortnightly banter with my friend there. I call her The Phantom Menace. Tell her about my impending…
Interview - a nice place with red telephone boxes everywhere.
Ballsed it up by letting slip how desperate for cash I am. I am, yes. He slips into second, stumbles into third. He waits weeks [...]......
|
| |
|
| A L Kennedy wins Book of The Year |
| 2008-01-22 18:01:31 |
A L Kennedy has just been announced as the winner of Costa’s Book of the Year award. In my conceited and inconsequential opinion, it’s an award well deserved.
I first encountered her work on my Modern Fiction course at university, where she was also a guest lecturer in the Honours year Creative Writing module. Original [...]......
|
| |
|
| No place for a love that never died |
| 2008-01-17 06:12:03 |
We move in silence.
I whistle along to the tune in my mind like the breeze over granite-coloured water - the sea air washing through my head alone, salting each thought. You say nothing. You never do. You just stare at the horizon, dumbfounded. Only you could be dumbfounded by the simplicity of a straight line. [...]......
|
| |
|
| Redundant Nerd Flotsam |
| 2008-01-15 13:19:00 |
The recent desktop obsessions of a full time nerd, obsessive and schoolgirl masquerading as a part time novelist…
Input over output. Input over output. Input over output…......
|
| |
|
| Anthropomorphosis |
| 2008-01-14 10:27:19 |
Today is the first Down Day of the New Year.
To celebrate this, at precisely 3:41pm today in the past, a man will be standing in Leicester Square, dressed in a business man costume and smoking a cigarette.
He’ll be watching the pigeons pecking and scuffling amongst the scraps underfoot. He’ll be looking, empty-eyed at the near-faceless [...]......
|
| |
|
| For the dawn |
| 2008-01-06 11:45:58 |
The writer no longer burns.
He cools himself with lukewarm instant coffee, eats cheap chocolate and doesn’t cut his hair.
He reads Vonnegut, bus tickets and old journal entries alike, the latter filled with the ash of long-cooled embers. Still not yet a Random House novelist nor a Faber poet. No Boy Nextdoor in the bed beside [...]......
|
| |
|
| Force restart |
| 2007-12-17 05:43:55 |
>_ Crash.
Too full of crap. Too many problems. Too much running (at any one time). It just doesn’t work anymore. This is a permanent fatal error? Type 0. Type more. Backup (selectively). Uninstall. Empty the trash with nostalgia. Those silly attachments: those unread files, unopened folders. “That’s made some space.” All that space - [...]......
|
| |
|
| |
 |
