| Social commentators and communication gurus often lament that people ecology (empathy, interest, curiosity in others and the spirits of equality and fraternity) has been replaced by fragmentation of communities into cliques and clans which have little interest in anyone outside their own physical, ideological or socio-economic territories. They claim we’ve created an increasingly selfish and self-seeking culture, evidenced by everything from bad driving behaviours to the callous disregard for the poor.So, let’s talk about narcissism, or egoism, and how it impacts on your average speaker, public figure or leader. Think of these types of people as ‘self’ made people in love with their makers, if you like. To apply a rather astute system of categorisation espoused by Martin Buber, they’re people who have “I-I” or “I-It” relationships.What narcissists don’t usually do is include others in their calculations. As you’ll discover they fail in many instances to make any tangible connection between themselves and other people.The I - You CovenantMartin Buber was an eminent Jewish theologian who wrote a three Valium tome called I and Thou. In it, he expresses what may be some of the most profound thoughts ever written on the subject of human relationships. Buber reasoned that the ultimate relationship one person can have with another is an “I-Thou” relationship. These types of relationships are necessarily rare and they can require an enormous investment of time and energy.“I-Thou” relationships are characterised by a deep recognition of another person’s individual differences and a choice to include that person in the ranks of the loved and cherished, despite any ongoing conflict those differences may create. This is what some people describe as unconditional love. A spouse, a few children, and a couple of friends are about all you could cope with.Buber wrote that most or some of us, most of the time, can strike up “I-You” relationships wi |
